Tomorrow is going to be H-A-R-D......

WOW..... tonight hasn't been easy either ... but tomorrow afternoon is going to be hard for both Dennis and I, and... Nathan...

Mr. Nathan got a haircut recently (I'll share those photos soon, they are already on my facebook if you are on there) ...   tonight, Daddy and I managed to get through the DVD videos that came with his Easypod device.

His what??

The device that will assist us in giving him nightly injections for Human Growth Hormone.  I have gone into the discussion here a little (in my other blog) MY UNIQUE FLOWERS: The Tale of the Human Growth Hormone ...  and I will go into it more tomorrow.  I normally don't get into a lot of the medical stuff here, but this is kinda big.  Especially for me.

When the shipment showed up with his device and supplies it hit me in the gut like a FIST ... everything escaped me, especially my composure.  I have become an emotional wreck and every time I talk about it I would have rivers of tears streaming down my cheeks. 

One of my worse fears, needles.....

Now I have to subject my child to one of my worst fears in the world, one that can be crippling to me, every single night ...  I have to manage to compose myself, stay strong, and not let my anxiety control my emotions, and not project my fears to him.  Kids are great at sensing stress and fear, and if I can push past mine, maybe he won't pick up on it....  maybe... hopefully ....

I am not looking forward to tomorrow afternoon.  After watching the boring DVD that came with the stuff, with a little kid who was OBVIOUSLY a paid actor who was more then happily putting that what had to be NEEDLE-LESS device to his little kid leg over and over ... but it was informative.  Tomorrow we have to go to the clinic (an hour away about) ... and go through our training.  Nathan will get his very first dose of HGH tomorrow at the clinic during our training.  There after he'll get it every night before bed here at home.  I'll be documenting the process in the other blog everyday. 

So, tonight Nana and Daddy had to run to the store, not only to get lithium batteries for the Easypod (and Diapers for Kaedyn!) and while Nana was there, she had to do a little spoiling!  See, she took Nathan out the other night because Noah had come home with a little robot toy from school, for doing his work, and Nathan was heartbroken that Noah wouldn't let him play with it.  So Nana took him out to try to find a little robot of his own...  and he ended up coming home with this ... 

We took it out of the package and he tried to find a button or something to push and he cried...  then he ran to Daddy's desk and got batteries, and brought them into the living room handing them to us, BEGGING us to put them in!!  Well, this particular toy, doesn't do ANYTHING ......  and it CRUSHED him..... crushed him... it was a $10 toy and Nana regretted not giving in and getting him the $45 toy that had all the bells and whistles. 

So tonight when Dennis and Nana were at Walmart, Nana fell on the spoil train and got him this one.... 

yep the $45 one with ALL the bells and whistles.  She's going to give it to him tomorrow after she gets done with work and we get home. 

He also has a bunch of character bandaids and I'm hoping to get him a nice collection of stickers (course I just realized we have a bunch of stickers for homeschooling, but they are learning stickers) ...

So I will take my camera, of course, and share the experience after I get home.