13 days ago..... we ARRIVED...

Where did we arrive?  Well in Washington State of course!  Before we left, Nathan managed to find a new past time he loved (climbing boxes)

After a lot of tears, realizing that we couldn't fit HALF of what we wanted into the moving truck and then having to friends and family behind (boo-hoo) ...  we packed every inch of space we could, two people in the moving truck, five people in the car...  and we left Wisconsin. 

We ended up getting a really late start, so we started making our way through the few miles of Wisconsin, into Minnesota, and on my trusty cell phone, I would post a status message on Facebook saying goodbye to each state as we left and hello to the next... 

We made it to North Dakota at about 3 AM, and it was snowing....  so settled in for a few hours of sleep.  We had packed the truck so tight we were afraid to get in there to get to our clothes that we needed to, and the babies didn't have socks, or sweatshirts, Noah had on a long sleeve but no socks, and well... Cal had just a t-shirt too... so being as cold as it was, and we didn't expect it... and finding out that regardless of how nervous opening the truck made us, we couldn't get in it because Dennis accidentally put the lock on upside down and we couldn't get the key in.... we left the hotel early to find some warm clothes at ... say ... Walmart!  Well, we found one.... 24 hour Walmart.... but we couldn't get in.  Apparently... and take note of this if you ever travel through North Dakota on a Sunday ....  the stores (retail) do not open until NOON on Sundays.  UGH!!  So we managed to wrap the kids up in what we had to get them out in the nippy air to the car, decided to find another store at some point on the way ... Then headed out again.

(Notice:  The sign says "HOME ON THE RANGE"... I almost broke into song!!  And the next one, it may have been cold, but I stopped at BEACH!)

Beach North Dakota that is.......... and let me just tell you.... we are NOW entering Montana...er.. I mean Bump!  Didn't know we had a state named BUMP... me either!  The things you learn!

I took the previous two pictures from a gas station parking lot that we stopped for gas at.  When we went to leave, the car wouldn't start.... lovely right?  Yeah I thought so ...  We had to get a pair of $30 jumper cables just to continue on the road.  (There is some short in Dennis' car that causes it to do this now and then) .. but hey, we saved the day and no one was the wiser... 

 (Picture of Calahan complementary of Cousin Ashley)

Then we pulled into BUTT....er.... BUTTE Montana for the night ...

We didn't get there as early as we wanted either, the kids wanted to go swimming really bad, but getting there at 10:30 .. the pool closed at 11 :(   Oh well I guess...  not to mention ... the kids were getting sick and it was just good times all around...

So the following morning we started out on our LAST stretch of the nation before getting to Nana & Papa's house!  (first picture is Butte, Montana .. in the morning)

Welcome to Idaho!!  I had REALLY bad luck with state signs ... yep, I did... It was my favorite state though, took about an hour to drive through!!

And with that...  it started to get dark and I couldn't take anymore pictures....  so I will leave you with this one before going on with our story...

The kids did really great the whole time, they would melt down once in awhile but it was usually because they were hungry. When we left Butte, we realized that we were going to be facing a snow storm when we went through the Snoqualmie Pass a couple hours from Mom's.  I was watching the webcams on the internet (on my phone) and updating Dennis on what was going on.  It was raining by late afternoon, by night fall it had started to snow in parts of it... then by the time we got there, there was probably 5 or so inches on the road.  They post the restrictions and such on the site I was watching so I knew what was going on.  It took us a long time but we managed to slowly make our way through the snow on the pass, I'm not going to lie, it was scary.  By the time we got to the bottom of the West Bound side of the pass, they had closed the East Bound pass and there were tons of cars lined up waiting (which is what Mom had been afraid would happen to us if we didn't get through early enough.)  But we made it through and we were on our way for the final bit of our travels.  We ended up getting to my Mom & Russ' at about 2am.  Then it was time for quick hellos and such, and where are we crashing cuz everyone was tired. 

But we made it... 

A Day full of Needles: Ramble... and an Award!

 Let me start out with the awesome new award I got from Shelly at Attic Girl  ... Thank you so much Shelly for thinking of me!

With this award, I am to be honest about 10 things in my life:


1:  I always wanted a little girl, didn't care how many kids I had or how many were boys as long as I got ONE girl.... but I got all boys (and a step-daughter I've never met)

2: I hope to foster kids someday down the road.   I think I'd be good at it.

3:  I love Ghost shows (Ghost Hunters, Ghost Adventures, The Haunting, etc)

4:  I met my husband online

5: I never drank until I was 29 years old.  My friends tried and tried and I'd have sips of stuff but - never liked it.  Then after separating from my ex-husband, I dated a bartender for a brief time and for the first time in my life - drank.  It lasted about 6 months, and I haven't drank since ... Dennis and I drink the Welch's non-alcoholic champagne, that's about it...  

6: I got sick when I was 16, in Highschool with an auto-immune disorder. It still effects me now.

7:  My lucky number is 13.  It's followed me all my life.  I have 13 letters in my full name, I ended up giving all my kids 13 letters in their first and middle name - first 2 were completely un-planned, 2nd two were planned because I realized I had done it with the first 2.  Dennis has 13 letters in his first and middle name.  I could go on and on and on but I won't.  It's just my lucky number and that's that.

8:  I look at the clock all the time at 12:12 am.  What does that mean?  "12:12," I would say.  "Witching hour." Then I would watch until it turned 12:13 am and I would say "12:13, next best thing."   Dennis thinks I died at 12:12 in a previous life and that I have to watch until it turns 12:13 so I know I'll live another day. 

9:  My Grandma was psychic and so am I ... lol..  but I don't let it out much, I fight it to much.  Don't believe me, I have many many stories with in my life ... ones that have been witnessed.

10:  I am very honest about my feelings and writing (blogging) is my therapy.  Just because I feel something one day, one way, doesn't mean it won't change later on because I am just spewing feelings I need to release and work through.  Sometimes by doing so, I see the other side and realize that I'm wrong, or that I'm not thinking around it right. 

 And now to reward it to others ...  I decided to go with some new blogs that I really like - because I honestly thought they could use some blogging community LOVE!! 

1: Kimberly at The rantings of a Drama Queens Mum ~ I have a drama king, does that count? LOL
2: WeloveTucker at Stay Home and Play 
3: Christie at Baby Tea Leaves
4: Lindsay from Once Upon a Mommy
5: April from Southern Sass

Before I forget, I totally changed my blog around and lost everything on my sides ... oye!  So I have to go around and collect buttons for those I enjoy reading!!  I hope that if you enjoy reading my blog, you grab my button!  But I'll be working on getting buttons here this weekend since it's so cold I don't think we are leaving the house!

 I've been having some trouble writing lately.  I am in this spot in a new book I'm working on where I am just ..... S-T-U-C-K ........ and I'm not sure where to go.  I wish I had more time to write, but I am enjoying the time with my kids right now too.  I can't complain.  Maybe I'll have some more time to devote to it soon. 

It seems to be a pretty good book so far.  Who knows.  Dennis really wants me to try get publish something.  I'm mighty afraid to.  I really am.  It's one thing to write for me, for the enjoyment of it, to share with friends, but now it's like....... I donno.  I don't write well under dead-lines.  LOL

 I've been missing my family - and when I say that, I mean that I've become extremely nostalgic of the fact that when I grew up, I was surrounded by extended family and I miss that.  I wish I had a big enough place to invite the family who lives around here, but I don't.  No one bothers to have a "Day" family Christmas to catch up and such.  Sure, we get together once in awhile when other family comes to town, or just cuz, but I wish we did something for the holidays of Thanksgiving and Christmas - regardless.  See, I grew up in a HUGE family.  I might be an only child for my Mom, and the middle child for my Dad, but I have 2 step-parents also, that I love.  They are all out in Washington state.  Our kids are the only grandkids that my Dad & Step-Mom currently have and my Mom and Step-Dad too.  So, it's hard.  I wish I could be with them all for the holidays.  I wish we could go there, and see them.  Let them spend time with the grandkids.  It doesn't seem fair.  Dennis' family are in North Carolina.  We want to move by family.  My MIL has other grandkids, some who live right by her.  I am being pulled, very strongly, to move to Washington.  I know their Grandparents would LOVE to have the kids around.  I'm tired of not having those crazy boisterous family gathering that drive one to drink and start smoking because of the craziness.   It's hard.   I asked Dennis where his gut told us to move, he said New Mexico.  LOL...  I could see visiting there, but not moving.  We do want to get down and see his family in the spring, and move sometime after that - when, I don't know.  I think it's time. 

 So since having Kaedyn, since Dennis started culinary school, since I had my surgery - I have been slacking on myself.  Since my surgery specifically, I have been gaining more weight then I did during Kaedyn's pregnancy.  I ended up getting Gestational Diabetes with Kaed and after it went away.  I have been keeping an eye on my blood sugars periodically.  They have been normal.  Well, up to a few weeks ago.  One day I was sitting at my desk, talking to Dennis on IM while he was at school and I was feeling really sick.  Headache, feeling dizzy while sitting down, and various other things.  Dennis told me to check my sugar and it was a little while after I had eaten, and it was 262 (or somewhere up there) ...  scared me, I had NEVER seen it that high, not even while I was pregnant.  So I have been monitoring it and it hasn't gone down.  I called my regular physician and made an appointment - which is next week.  Today I had my blood panel.  Blood sugars, thyroid, cholesterol... etc.  My fasting blood sugar that I took this morning on my monitor was 303.  (I think it's calibrated wrong)  My blood test it was in the 180's . So yeah, according to my OBGYN who I saw today said that puts me in the Diabetic category.  I asked him to look up the test results.  The rest of my test results were great.  My good cholesterol is great, my bad cholesterol is very low (in fact it's lower then "normal") .. my thyroid is good, my white blood cells and such were good.  So, I really have to work on losing weight and getting both my High Blood Pressure and my Diabetes under control and GONE.  (at least I hope gone)...  so whole at my OBGYN for my "yearly" he told me I was overdue for my tetanus shot.  Yay... so they were nice to harpoon me there after I had already gotten jabbed by the vampires this morning.   I told Dr B he was mean and he laughed.  He said "Look at it this way, they took out earlier, and now we're putting back in."  LOL

 Yes, I am TOTALLY a Reality TV addict.  I was happy with who won Amazing Race, I cannot WAIT to see Jake on The Bachelor and when American Idol starts - YAY!  But Ellen replacing Paula?  Hummm.. (don't get me wrong, I love Ellen, I think she's a funny funny woman) ... I am watching the Teen Mom series on MTV because I caught a marathon of 16 and Pregnant and got addicted.  I watch the Kardashians (and am not to afraid to admit I had to look that up to spell it!) ...  I watch Tori & Dean when it's on, The Hills, The City, and so much other junk that Dennis goes "hummmmm" when I watch!   He says it rots my brain!  Train Wreck TV Is AWESOME ..... I tell him it's because I am studying human nature for my books!  After all, not everyone can act like ME!  LOL  ...  But I have to mention Survivor for a moment....  Russell, I just don't know about that guy!   And that's my blurb on reality TV for the night.

Wednesday Writer Workshop

Mama Kat posts a "Writers Workshop Wednesday" ... I started mine last night but didn't get a chance to post it until this morning... but it's done! Whoohoo... here are my answers to her prompts! (You only need to pick one, but I decided to go for all 5)

1.) Create a video for your blog (vlog) and participate in Tim's "vlogemotions" by talking about an emotion you've felt this week. You can link up here AND link up at Tim's place at Fort Thompson on Thursday. That's right...you have my permission to double dip.

A vlog?? Ahhh… I love ya’ll but I don’t think so. No one wants to suffer through a video of me with screaming kids in the background and/or Nathan hanging off my shoulder. My video would end up containing a little blond head searching my desk for jelly beans, or pointing at something on my desk, wanting it. Yeah – just not a good idea… I'm still thinking about it though. (so one *might* pop up today)

But … I have no problem talking about emotions. An emotion I felt this week, there are so many after all. But one that I felt, I have to say … concern mixed with a little fear. I worry about my boys. Mainly Noah and Nathan. If you don’t know about my boys, it’s a long story but I would go read HERE … in the side bar there is a lot of the history of what is going on. Anyway – I wonder what kind of future they’ll have. I just wrote about this in their blog. My biggest questions are: Will they have a normal adulthood? Will they be able to have kids? Will they be able to find someone who loves them for who they are? Knowing how loveable Noah is now, I don’t think I have a doubt with him finding someone or having a fully functional adulthood (something I was told he would NOT have). Noah is such a magnet for people. There is always that fear of something happening, every time he gets sick, I instantly snap into panic mode – will this be it, will this be the beginning of the end. See, with Noah’s disorder it can be in any organ, and we don’t know, and that organ can fail at any time. He’s already come close to dying a few times but the closes was the week that Nathan was born, his kidneys were failing and the ER at home had completely blew it off. I had a OB appt at the clinic 2 hours away, took him in there, and they immediately admitted him. IMMEDIATELY. Thank goodness they did, and took it seriously. If they hadn’t – I fear what would have happened. But regardless, it’s a fear I don’t think about often, but that I can’t escape. With Nathan, not knowing yet what is the full picture of his issues, I have no idea… about anything. He is the sweetest boy and you can’t help but smile or laugh around him and his goofiness. There is a real chance that neither of them will be able to have kids. Noah because of his disorder, Nathan because of his organ issues down there, and if they find those special someones, find out they can’t have children, and want them, I already decided that I’ll support them in any way I can – through adoption, or surrogates – whatever they choose. Just like any mother, I just want my child to have happiness and love. It is the two most important things in life.

2.) Do you want a baby?

Do I want one? Well that is debatable. I have always had a dream of having a little girl. Dreams of pink, and frills, pig-tails and barbies, baby dolls and butterflies. Do I want to have another chance at that dream, who wouldn’t? Even if I got ANOTHER little boy, I wouldn’t care. I mean I look at Kaedyn, remembering the utter break down I had when I found out he was a boy. Dr. B (my OB) said “Well, it’s a boy” and I broke down into tears. I was SO happy he was healthy, and I had no doubt of that because for the first time since Calahan (my oldest), there was a baby inside me growing NORMALLY. That was a HUGE relief. But it was also a death of a dream. Now that I have Kaedyn in my life, and I know him and see his personality, I wouldn’t trade that little boy for all the pink in the world. That little boy looks JUST like me (thank goodness I look like two pretty boys or Kaedyn might have a problem! LOL) … and he is the happiest baby. Dennis and I find ourselves both saying “he is the greatest baby” … now, now that those first three months of hell are over anyway … but he is the greatest baby. He is the type of baby that makes you WANT more! I would love to someday still have that chance of the pink baby, but it probably won’t happen for us unless we adopt, because Dennis got fixed between my getting the amnio with Kaedyn at 16 weeks, and getting the results back at 18 weeks. Yep… he got fixed while I was 17 weeks pregnant. So, no want in the world can change that factor. We are both happy with our four boys (and the Princess should she ever join us) ... I feel complete... my boys are everything to me... Now with all that said, if a "Whoops" were to happen (which I doubt it would) ... then we would accept and love the baby no matter what, as we have done.

3.) Who got in big trouble this week?

Hummm… surprisingly no one really did. The week isn’t over yet though. Calahan got in HUGE trouble last week. Today is actually his last day of being suspended off the school bus, and he can start riding again tomorrow! Yay!

Big trouble… let me think… well it’s not trouble per-say – but Dennis dropped his English class. Between him getting sick prior to the family getting the flu, and then the family getting that flu… he missed a lot of school. He was actually worried about “attendance failing” … see if he misses so many days, then he “attendance fails” all his classes – it’s a guideline at the school. But he didn’t, however his English class he missed a lot. He missed writing a paper that was recently due, and had a hard time doing it. He was going to write the paper – an informative paper – on Dandy Walker (something our son Nathan has) … but once he sat down to write it, he realized that he couldn’t find a lot of info on it, what he could find was so medically termed that he didn’t understand it, and he didn’t think he could write 3 pages about it. So he talked to his instructor about changing subject, even though the paper was already late. Then he came home, expecting to punch out the paper and family life happened, dinner, crabby babies, needing 4 hands cuz 2 didn’t cut it, and then… he passed out in the chair about 8:30. He planned on staying after his classes and sit in the resource center to bang out the papers (the other due early next week, the next one an argumentative type which he said he already had all planned out) … but instead I guess he talked to his teacher and found out that due to the classes he had missed (he loses points) and if he got an A on EVERYTHING else, he would be able to get, at best, a C in her class. A “C” isn’t acceptable to him. So he went through his options, and decided to drop the class (now that he’s only got a week left) and re-take it. He doesn’t have to re-pay for the class, which is good. And he’s actually looking forward to taking it over to prove he can do better. See English and writing has always been a harder issue for him because he is one of those rare few with dyslexia. So it’s a point he wants to prove to not only everyone, but mostly, for himself. So as you can tell, not trouble, just a hitch in the plan.

4.) Write a poem for your mother.

She has taught me,

To be brave.

She has held my hand,

When I needed to be saved.

She has sat by my side,

In times that were utter blurs,

She has even been there,

When I didn’t think I needed her.

She says she was lucky,

To have a child like me.

But I’m lucky to have her,

She’s my best friend, you see.

My Mom is the best,

That I know is true.

All I can say, is…

I love you, thank you.

5.) Time for a trip? Where are you headed this summer?...Or where would you go if you COULD.

Speaking of Mom’s… there is a tentative plan to go out to Washington state to go visit my Mom, my Step-Dad, my Dad, my Step-Mom, my Sister .. my brother if he comes out from hiding… and some of my mom’s friends. Even though my mom and Russ have met Dennis, my Dad hasn’t nor anyone on that side of the family. Even though my mom has seen and been around Nathan & Kaedyn (she was with me for ALL the boys births, not easy when you live half way across the country!) … no one else has on my side of the family, and frankly neither has anyone on Dennis’ side. We live in WI, my Parents are in WA State (no I’m not from WA Sate, I’ve always lived right where I’m at, I was born in a hospital a few miles from me, I’ve attended a church all my life that is across town…they just *happened* to land in the same city!) … and Dennis’ family is in IL and NC. Now, his Dad has seen Nathan, when he was super little. Really that’s it. All they have are pictures and videos on the internet.

My Mom and Russ were talking about us coming out there this summer for a visit. This involves driving… 30 some hours one way, and back… 10 days, 4 days on the road… leaving 6 days to visit. Not so bad. Cal and Noah really want to go back out, last time they (and I) were out there was 2006 – Dennis was home – alone. Poor guy. He really wants to go out there. (We’ve discussed moving out there, but Mom & Russ are moving back here.) Last time I was there (in 2006) I didn’t get a chance to see my Dad & family. I saw my Dad and Step-Mom for an hour in 2004 when they stopped by… last time I really saw them was 2001 – before Noah was even *here*. I would like to see them. Very much.

But because Dennis is going to school and everything else, we don’t have the money to get out there, so my Mom would end up funding the whole trip, and I don’t really see that happening (although she’s thinking still) so it probably won’t happen. I’d be having a garage sale before we left to help, but who knows how much that would end up bringing in. I have a ton of baby clothes and stuff to sell though, and I do need to start getting everything in one place and priced so I can do that.

I know Dennis’ mom would LOVE to see the kids too, and meet them… but #1: we can’t do a trip down there cuz we don’t have the money, and #2: we wouldn’t have the time to do both with Dennis’ school. IF Dennis got a part time job (he’s been looking) and all that, and we were able to save up some, we might be able to go down there for Christmas. We can’t go to my parents for Christmas, actually, we can’t go from October to April or so cuz the mountain passes are closed.

SO .. it’ll happen, they’ll both happen … maybe not this year, but hopefully next, at the latest.

As for where I would want to go? Well… I would LOVE to take the kids to Disney – I mean, it’s a dream. I thought it would be a reality with Noah, I was encouraged to sign him up for Make A Wish long ago, but come to find out, he doesn’t qualify. I can understand that looking at him, now. But it bothers me with the above talked about fear hanging over me, part of me doesn’t understand. I don’t think Nathan would qualify either, but I don’t know.

Other dream places for me to visit – Ireland, Italy, and a cruise to Alaska… lol. That’s it. I don’t want much.