Mother's Day Demands!!

First off - a very happy Mother's Day to all my blogging friends out there!!! Without you ... blogging would be boring... plus, you are fantastic Mommies ...

Now........ as for my day .... I have demands!!  YES I DO.....

#1:  BREAKFAST IN BED .... 

 ah...... that isn't exactly what I had in mind......

That's more of what I had in mind... only... make the coffee ... hot chocolate ...  cuz I don't drink coffee.... and the pancakes ... french toast, because I prefer that ....  and hold the fruit, expect the grapes, unless you want me dead ....  cuz I'm allergic....

Yep - that's about right...

#2:  A LOVELY BUBBLE BATH

Yes, a lovely one ...... most of my baths or showers for that matter involved having to lock the door so that uninvited guests don't join me - and I'm not talking my husband either.....  and when met with the LOCKED door - screaming fits directly outside the bathroom door carry on...  I will have NONE of that.  No crying - no fits ....and a huge bathtub that will fit my fat ass curves all under water to where half of me isn't cold ...well, I can't change the tub so ..  peace, quite, candlelight...... music.....  and bubbles, lots of lots of pretty smelling bubbles..... that will have to do

#3:  FLOWERS

Again, not exactly what I had in mind....   I don't want the kind you put in a vase either - although, they are pretty - don't get me wrong.  I would rather have a PLANT ...  a pretty pretty flowering plant..... I love my planted flowers :)

#4: TIME TO READ A GOOD BOOK...... 

That would be nice, but I don't have a hammock....  this would be lovely .... 

Surrounded by the water, earth and forest ...... so peaceful...... I love it..... that would be amazing....  if it were a comfortable tree........   but this is my dream....

Reading in a spot I can just curl up and lose myself into the world written on the pages in my hands... surrounded by all the amazing books that I loooooooooooooove ....

But, reading in bed will have to do surrounded by my Nora Roberts..... books, not the person herself...


5: A SPA TREATMENT..... 

I demand a hot guy named Alex or David or that other David.... or even Ryan ...  oh or maybe Nathan .....   with their hot bods .... take time for their tv/music careers and give me a candlelight massage with hot rocks and lotions and .... who cares.....  just - that's what I order and if that's not possible ... who cares.....

6:  GIFTS

That's right......... there better be gifts of planted flowers, books, candles..... large sparkly things.... expensive vacations, oh a van would be better........ oh well.....   at least I have the ones the kids make at school....

7:  A Cake

There damn well better be a cake.  Diabetes be-damned...... I want cake.  Something that looks like that would be nice.  Realistically - it'll probably be something homemade with "Mother" spelled wrong.  Oh well, it's the thought that counts .....  right?

8:  DRINKS ....

Yep, if you had my family you'd be drinking on a daily basis too........ only, I don't drink wine... or anything alcoholic ...  that is a picture of grape juice right?!?!?!   These days, I mostly drink Gatorade....

 9:  Trip to the Tattoo Shop....

Yep, for all of my kids to get that tattoo on their butts..... just to always remember I changed their diapers...  okay, that could be considered child abuse, but it's a nice idea....

10: LOTS OF CANDLE LIGHT

I love candles..... love them lite up and making everything smell purdy ...... yep, candles can be and will be done!

11:  NO CLEANING

That's right..... ain't gonna do it!!!

Most of all - I want to hug my mom, tell her I love her ....  get hugs and love from my husband and kids, then I'll be good :)

Death By Coupons....

If I should die...... I want to make it clear, it was the coupons that killed me...... they suffocated me....

My Mom and I are couponers ...  COUPONERS..... not the extreme type you see on TV, although, we would be if our stores double coupons ...... but they don't ....... because they suck can't don't.....

SO ... since I had to drop out of school to be home with the invalid ... er... Dennis....  and she started school up again ....

I got handed the job of keeping up on clipping and organizing the book .......

THE BOOK - this morning (May 12) after I finished

Yep, THAT is the book.........

That's it's proper name you know.... THE BOOK ...... I suppose I should capitalize it then when I refer to it....

I started clipping last night before the kids went to bed......

Then after they went to bed ... I moved to the coffee table...

and my garbage pile scared me....  I swear it was growing and growing off my fear ....  threatening to eat me...

I spent 4 hours last night ........ I got up at 8 this morning and started on it right away - and when I got up (didn't eat, drink, nuffin ... not good for me... lol....) ....  WHEN I FINISHED and got up ..... it was after 1pm.  WTHeck!?!!?

That means ..... 9+ hours???  REALLY????

Ugh.

The other day ... I went shopping ....  WITH COUPONS ....... and the crippled hubby who kept zooming around in his little scooter getting stuff.....  mind you - almost everything I got was on sale and/or had a coupon for.

TOTAL before ANY discounts (including store ones) was $620 plus change......

after - it was definitely not that much - but I didn't save as much as I wanted to (not even half) and ended up with a receipt that was as tall as me!

But you know if I hadn't gone COUPON shopping - I wouldn't have spent as much as I did... lol.... who am I kidding .... yes I would have......

Sadness of a Happy Birthday ...

Sadness ....  shock...   feeling as if you were just blindsided .... 

All things we've been experiencing this week.  Last week we got Mother's Day Cards for all our Mom's and a Birthday Card for my ex MIL (my ex husband's mom and the Grandmother of my older two boys.)

We filled them out ... signed them....  addressed and stamped...... and...... we live in an apartment - unless you catch the mailman, you have to find a mailbox.   So Saturday when my Mom left, I asked her to drop them at the post office - it was (sorta) on her way home... 

Sunday I went out ....   and I had spent 3 hours at a graveyard taking photos of some of the last little bits we can give our loved ones - the last thing - we ... the living ...  can give them.   Their gravestones, memorial stones.... the last bits of them left after we're gone ... the ones that remember who they are, the memories we had with them - gone with us.... for those who follow us to have a little piece of them. 

I hear some of you saying "how morbid" but in all honesty - some of these gravestones are beautiful pieces of art and affection for someone that was loved dearly ....

Baby Avery was obviously loved for 5 beautiful days, only one of many I saw

Beautiful crosses with intricate scrolling

 

 

 

Elsie Metta Lemke ...  she was only 25-26 years old, her gravestone is beautiful, unique and really caught my eye.

 There is the graveyard angel........ that upon my first visit I snapped a quick picture of, and upon returning found it had been knocked to the ground by compassionless people....

And the sad little angel of a little girl who was lost too soon ....

Mildred was only 11 months old when her parents lost her and created this memorial for her.

Then there were moments that caught me ...  like this...

Three sisters buried together

Those who fought and served and died for our Freedom.

I don't just do this for myself, I do this for a website called Find A Grave - where if you know the area your loved one was buried - you can search the database to see if there is a photo of that last memorial...  or request one.  As someone requested one - and I was out searching for them that day. 

It's funny .. I have been digging so deep into my Genealogy .... my husband's ...  my ex's for that part of my older two boys history ........

Found out that they are indeed related to the likes of  Henry III King of England, and his successors.... King Edward I, King Edward II, King Edward III.....  My (ex) MIL hadn't dug this deep into her ancestry yet and I was soooooo excited to share this with her.   She LOVES history ... 

Well, I tried calling her several times..  the kids tried calling her because they wanted to talk to her and to check on their Dad ..... 

Something was off.  I started stalking her facebook a little and noticed that her friends were starting to say "I/We Love You" and I recognized one name as her niece.  So I messaged her, the niece, on Friday... and explained we'd been trying to get ahold of her and gotten no response.  We were worried and seeing all these messages on her facebook really had me worried and so I just wanted to see if everything was alright. 

Sunday, after I got home from the graveyard and my ...... interesting adventure there ....  3 hours of searching, half of which with a grounds keeper trying to pin point the spot.....  only to find there was no headstone for this person ...  Kaedyn lost my cell phone, I pinched a nerve/pulled a muscle/hurt my hip....  but the dog and Kaedyn got amazing runs!  (And luckily my cell phone was found and returned to me - as my Aunt said, thank goodness for honest people!)

I sat down and opened my email........

Saw a message from her niece .......

Things are not good.  I'm sorry to have to tell you this ... but......... 

My heart sank, my heart broke ... and I fought back the tears ....... instantly ..... thinking ...

WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MY KIDS????  

Last year she had a "mini-stroke" .... and then I guess on Thursday - she fell....  her boyfriend found her and she wasn't responding like she should.  He got her to the ER and they started running tests.  They believe (from my understanding) she had a stroke.  Upon more tests, they discovered a large tumor in her brain and sent her to Rochester, MN - Mayo Clinic - who did tests and found out the type of tumor it is, is completely inoperable because it's grows extremely quickly and had already taken over half her brain.  They said they believed (best guess I suppose) the tumor started in December.  They were shocked she was able to work as long as she did with it. 

There had been bleeding in her brain ...  I assume from the stroke, but I didn't press ...  the bleeding had stopped.  They said - best guess, if it didn't start back up, she'd have 6 weeks - tops.  If it started again, it would be a matter of days. 

With this type of tumor, she is in no pain ...  she's not suffering.   She'll sleep more and more and one time, she just won't wake back up. 

She was aware and able to communicate a little - although she is completely paralyzed on her left side. 

Last update I heard - she was no longer able to recall names, but she does still act as if she remembers who people are...

First thing I did was call my (ex) Father-In-Law and let him know.  They didn't have my number, I was certain they didn't have his.  If she dies .... the only link my ex has to the "outside world" is his Dad.  And someone needed to let my ex know.  I talked to him - broke the news - and then ended up hanging up with him, calling my (ex) Mother-In-Law's brother to get the details (stated above) and called my (ex) Father-in-Law back to fill him in and give him numbers. 

He called me yesterday to thank me - again - for thinking to call him right away.  He talked to her brother - he told my ex-husband who wasn't taking it well - which is what was expected ...  

How would you react to if you found out your Mother was dying and you couldn't get to her...... 

I would be devastated - but frantic if I couldn't be there with my Mom. 

Today ....... is her 59th Birthday ...... Today .... 

Every birthday you ask her "how old are you now?" 

And every birthday she would smile, with laughter in her eyes and say "I'm 29 of course!" 

When I turned 30, I looked at my boys and said "Wow, Grandma is younger than I am!" 

I was hoping she'd make it to today ....  I think she deserves to turn 59 ...  I mean 29, again!

I have been meaning to write this blog since Sunday.  Don't know if I didn't because writing it all down makes it more real ....  or I just wanted to wait until today. 

The boys sent her flowers ...  er... my mom sent flowers in the boys name... 

We were told she got them ....  but she acted like she didn't want them :(   It hurts a little.... 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY KIDS GRANDMA - to my Mother-In-Law (because marriage might make you family, and divorce doesn't change that) .... 

It's your last birthday - and we wish it wasn't.  Wanting it to not be true, wishing and praying for miracles - it doesn't always change it....  but we're taking a little peace of mind in knowing you aren't suffering.   I take a little peace of mind knowing she'll be up there playing with all her angel grandbabies too ...  making them laugh, and smile ... telling them stories and tales from life and the past .... 

I ask for prayers ........  prayers that she passes peacefully and quickly when her time comes.  Prayers that she continue to not be in pain and she just fall asleep like the doctors say ....  I pray for her to be loved and surrounded by her family in our absence (which I know she is.)

She is loved ...  she will be missed ....

Wordless Wednesday - Birdie Friends

My Roots are Interesting.....

So I have always been interested in my heritage.  I grew up believing I was mostly Irish.  Found out, I'm mostly Norwegian, then Irish.... then German .... with some Holland Dutch, Swiss, and various other Northern European in me.  I have been drawn to Ireland since I was little, so I found it slightly disappointing I wasn't as Irish on one side as I thought....

See.  My Grandfather was my "Daddy" ... in ways.  My Dad didn't get to raise me - through circumstances beyond his control.  My Mom wanted us to stay with family, and he was a Navy man.  He got a divorce from his first wife, and met my mom - they had their relationship - he joined the Navy.... came home on leave, saw my mom .... had to go back and my mom found out she was pregnant.  By then he was being stationed and assigned....   and he met his current wife.  Don't get me wrong, I love my Dad, my Step-Mom and my siblings that I didn't get to grow up with ....   but my Grandpa ...  he was the first love of my life.

(My Mom hiding) Grandpa and I. <3

 I have to add ...  I went through this phase when I was little.  Because I didn't have a Daddy I would be-raid my mom with crap. I remember all this.  I confronted her one day, actually I think it was more than once.  I had it all FIGURED OUT!!!  I didn't have a Daddy because....  da-da-dum! (that was a drum-roll-ish type thing in case you were wondering) ....  I WAS OBVIOUSLY ADOPTED!!!

My mom just rolled her eyes and pulled out my baby book and said ....  See - this was you when you were born. 

Um........ really?   That's me .... 

With lead to a whole new conspiracy theory ...  I WAS SWITCHED AT BIRTH!!!!  That baby is too dark, and black hair?  No way is that me. 

Well, I've come to accept it ...  that is me .... trust me, I gave birth to that 32 years later....

My little Mini-Me. 

Regardless.  After I moved on from that theroy ....  I moved onto greater pastures.   MOMMY WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE A BABY????  I WANT A BROTHER OR SISTER!!  Oh Lordy, I had some spunk didn't I?

My Mom got in contact with my Dad and Step-Mom.  Found out I had a baby brother who was 3 years old (to my 5 yeas old) ... and we got to meet!  First time I met my Daddy was when I was 5.

My Mom, Me (age 5), Dad, My Brother (age 3), & My Step-Mom

I would also end up with a little sister, and found out I had two older sisters.   Which I thought was super cool!!  My Mom, well, she wasn't going to have anymore kids.  Infact, right after I was born she told my Grandma that she wasn't going to get anymore kids from her, she better start bugging her sons.  She did have seven of them....  living.   My Uncle Lance had been a twin and they lead my Grandma to believe my Uncle Lance would die because he was the weaker and smaller of the two babies....  being back in the early 1960's ... they didn't have the same technology that we do now...   but... my Uncle Lynn ended up aspirating which caused him to die at 2 days old. 

My Dad and I had a distant but ... I think.... great relationship.   One reason being any anger I had, was my issue - not his.  I knew he was doing the best he could.  I knew my sisters blamed him for a lot.  My Grandparents (his parents) didn't even want to see me because I was the illegitimate mistake that happened between his marriages.  I was.... am....  the bastard child. 

So what, I embrace it....  I mean really.   I know all parties involved were just doing what they felt was right.  They did the best they could.  Why hold onto such things and let them define you when only YOU can define you.  And my Dad really puts a lot of blame onto himself, and I don't think it's necessary ....  I KNOW he did the best he could.  That's fine.  I'm good with what I got :)  It's better then what a lot of kids get....   all I needed to know was he loves me :)  And I do know that.

Regardless... it's not the way I wanted to be defined.   So I would suck up any attention I got from my Dad and love it.  We would talk on the phone, write.... etc.  I think - today - we have a great relationship.  It's not ideal but I love him dearly.  I love my step-mom and she has embraced me as her own in ways. It's much the same way I feel about the Princess.   I may not have gotten the honor to meet my step-daughter yet - but I love her.  She's part of our family - the boys know about her, she's not referred to as the "step-sister" or "half-sister" but their SISTER.  Period.  

I always wish I was closer to my siblings.  I always longed for that sister relationship.  SO I seek it out with my best friends. 

Anyway - back to my Grandpa.... I got off on a wild tangent there. 

So ....   originally I thought the following.

My Grandfather was adopted.  - TRUE....   he was adopted by his Father's sister ....   so why?

Well, I thought (had been told) that my Grandpa's parents died when he was a baby.   also TRUE....  Only I thought his Mom died first and then his Dad.   I knew that - at least - his Mom died of Tuberculosis ...  and I suspected that his Dad did too.  Upon some research (mostly done by another family member - thank you Dawn!) ....  I found out this was untrue.   Well.... at least part of it.  My Great-Grandfather died before my Granfather was even born!  Yep.... he never got to meet his son. 

I also found out - when I was younger - that my Grandpa had a sister, Aunt Irene....  which I thought was super cool and didn't realize until I was older that's where the relationship was to all these 2nd cousins I had (that were my age).  I also found out he (my Great-Grandfather) was married before to a Hattie M. GUELDNER - who was born in 1887 and they had a daughter they named Marion,  I don't know much about Hattie, I can't find any info on her.  I'm not sure if she died and that's why my Great Grandfather remarried or what...  but it's interesting.  Oh I do know she was born in Nebraska and her father was born in Wisconsin and mother was born in Iowa .....  but that's it.  I'd like to know more. 

Anyway - My Grandpa was born 5 July 1921 and my Great-Grandfather William died 2 Feb 1921 of Turberculosis.... my Great-Grandmother Olga also had it.....  (huh, I put together he died on my Mom's birthday......)  Well into the pregnancy, but not  even close to when he was born.  Aunt Irene was only about 16 months old. 

So after my Grandfather was born, my Aunt Irene was given to one of Olga's relatives and my Grandfather to my Great-Grandfather's sister.... Louisa and her husband Gail.  They raised my Grandpa since he was a baby....  My Great-Grandmother Olga thought she was dying of Tuberculosis, so she gave my grandfather up right away, and his sister.  My Great-Grandmother ended up living a few more years.  She got re-married in 1923 and ended up dying from Tuberculosis on November 14, 1924. 

So my Grandfather was adopted and raised by his aunt and uncle.  I knew this growing up (might have heard some facts wrong) but .....  I was really interested in his biological parents, of course...  because that's where the heritage comes from.  I found out the Irish I thought existed with him - didn't.  William was German (and upon reading more into the Thalacker side, which is going to be next to impossible to find out about - is also most likely Swiss.)   And Olga is - of course - 100% Norwegian.

We had never seen pictures of William or Olga (at least I didn't) growing up.  Now - thanks to a website called Find A Grave, I saw my Great-Grandfather William for the first time.

William F. Thalacker 1882-1921 - My Great-Grandfather ...

My Mom and I both looked at it and thought that my Grandfather favors his Dad .... The picture is a little distorted due to it being on his gravestone.  Which is.....

And then today - I saw my Great-Grandmother Olga for the first time.  My (cousin whatever removed) Dawn shared these pictures today .....  the pictures she sent were orange - so I did the best I could to bring out some detail and more appealing....

 Great-Grandma Olga is the little girl smack dab in the middle.

and then it dawned on me why I couldn't find her grave - since I had completely forgotten that she had remarried the year before she died.  So I managed to find that - also.  Dawn confirmed this is her gravestone.

Which I realize she also has a picture of...

And Dawn said she was going to try and locate some of the older pictures of Olga she has.  So I'm really excited to see those too. 

I think I may need to create a Genealogy Blog since I'm finding a lot of neat stuff.  And - I'm doing my ex-husband's line also - so that my older two kids know their heritage on his side.  (Not to mention Calahan is learning about it in school and super interested in his German side right now)....

For example:  I found out that my older two boys are the direct decedents of King Henry III of England, King Edward the I of England, King Edward the II of England, and King Edward the III of England.... (Some of these Kings were also entitled "Lord of Ireland" also)  a ton of other nobility and a few other kids (and more I haven't uncovered) .... including a French King ... 

Yep, I think it's time to create another blog to my collection....

The Client List

How many of you grew up watching this in your teenage years?

I sure did... LOVED the show!!!


How many listened to her sing and bought her music in the 90's?

I DID!


 We've all grown up! LOL...

So she has a new show on - and I looooooove her so of course I'm watching.   Been a fan since Kids Inc and that's saying a lot :/   Anyway ....  huge fan of Ghost Whisperer ...  and now she's taking on a completely different role.

She plays a woman who's faces with having to support her two children on her own - her husband just up's and leaves one day.   She takes a job as a massage therapist and ends up taking on more .... in order to get better tips and make ends meet for herself.

Even though I don't necessarily agree with it - I understand the position.  It's hard when you are suddenly faced with having to support your children by yourself.

It's a fun, interesting... and.... sexy.... show!  LOL...  It's more than just happy endings too .... there is a lot of complex plots going on ...  her mom trying to be a "help" ... her brother in law and her having this strange but fantastic sexual chemistry ....   If you don't like the first episode, you won't like the series ... but if you are a fan of JLH ....  I'm sure you'll get sucked in like I was :)  LOL