Motherhood........

What is it about motherhood (er.... parenthood) that provides you with the most hilarious and hair pulling moments of your life. 

But I am a mother, and this is my blog, so we're going with Motherhood ...

Just today ....

Kids are laying down in the living room - watching a show - saw the STOMPIES commercial (ya know - the slippers you can stomp in that do stupid things) these things......

... well ... Nathan comes running up to me...

Nathan: Stuffies!!!
Mom: Go lay downs
Nathan: (louder) STUFFIES
Mom: Stompies - I getcha - go lay down ...
Nathan: (huffs off and curls up on his spot crying)
Mom: Nathan - I gotcha - but you have to ask Santa

3 minutes later, he shows me my pink owl slipper that has eyeballs on it.  (pic below of my slippers)

Mom: Oh - you like those? Want the other one? (reaches down gets the other one and hands it to him.) Now take your fake Stompies and go lay down. (watches him do just that) . ....

Yep.. cuz that's how we roll!

AND AND AND . ....  why is it ... Mom has to do EVERYTHING in the bathroom.......   **WARNING** if you don't like the words pee and poop - do not progress in this blog!!!

Sooooooooo ....  I swear it is IMPOSSIBLE for no one else in this family to CHANGE THE TOILET PAPER when the roll is empty.

WHY????

I'm the only girl in the family - unless you count the animals, who are all female - however, none of which use the toilet, unless to drink out of it.

SO .....  I have a sign that hangs in my bathroom that say .. (this is my actual sign) ...

"My aim is to keep this bathroom CLEAN your aim will HELP!!"

For all you woman out there who live with a bunch of males, as cute as the sign is - even if you hang it directly above the toilet where those said males would have to look while standing to pee....  IT DOESN'T WORK.

They still pee all over the floor - all over the seat - they don't lift up the seat - they don't care... I swear sometimes they aim for the ceiling - but I'd never say that out loud - ever - cuz ... I don't want to give them ideas.

The dog pees in the bathroom when she has to go and she's not outside.   I can't complain much about this - I would MUCH rather her do it there then on the carpet somewhere....   I just wish we could fit her potty grass thing in there. ANYWAY ...........

Yesterday - I walked into the bathroom and there is a HUGE puddle of pee on the floor.  I can't help but to wonder - was that a child? or the dog?  I don't know..........

Today - I walk in there - no toilet paper on the roll.  At least I realized it before I started to pee - so I made a mad bare but reach into the bathroom pantry for a roll....

Also today - I sit on a wet seat ........ serves me right, for not looking ......... right?  Always wipe it down - cuz there can always be invisible drops..

And ALSO today ..... I walk in there - and we're all potty trained - other than Nathan ...  (and sometimes the puppy) ....   So Nathan has such a tiny hiney ... and he has to have one of those seat things that fit on the adult toilet seats .... otherwise - he falls in.  So he's potty training - it's an ongoing process with him ...  Well, he had come running out to us with his pants and diaper around his ankles and he yells at me "I POOP" ...........

Okay - 1: He had been playing just find with his brothers 2 minutes earlier .......  2: THIS IS HUGE FOR HIM ... cuz we can get him to pee in the potty all the time, but pooping is another story.  Even to get him to ADMIT he's poopy is great!

So -  I get him cleaned up - he gets his PJ's on and a new diaper/pull up ...  and later when I go to the bathroom..........

.......his seat is on the potty ............. covered in poop....

........................ the toilet seat has it on it too - and going down the side..............

All I can think is.........

EW!!!

Yep .. but I have to clean it up .  I take the potty seat up and I put it on the edge of the bathtub.  I go get wipes and go back in the bathroom and first clean off the toilet cuz I'm about to start doing the pee pee dance.   So after I get that clean, I sit down and as I'm reliving myself I'm cleaning off the potty seat thinking ........... WHO DOES THIS???  

And let me tell you - it takes me longer to clean off the seat then it did to empty my bladder.

After I get it clean - I wash my hands, then when I sit down at my desk I squirt sanitizer on my hands....  just to be safe.

So ........  I am thinking ..... on one hand, I'm so happy and proud of him - it seems like a step in the right direction for him!!!!!!   1: He went to the potty and tried to (finish) pooping in the potty.   2: He told me he was poopy!!

............ on the other hand, I'm thinking ............. there isn't enough sanitizer in the world to make me feel better.

And that ......... folks........ is Motherhood!