I saw this halarious video of Jenson Ackles and Misha Collins - you know, Dean Winchester and Castiel from Supernatural. I look up videos of them when I want to laugh, Being as sick as I was yesterday, I really wanted to laugh... so I found some videos of "the boys" ...
Now, truth be told, I was mad at Supernatural for taking Jared Padalecki from Gilmore Girls where he played Dean, Rory's first boyfriend. Except they didn't "take" him. I was just mad. LOL. So I started watching Supernatural with Dennis when we started dating. I loved it.
And then, I had to stop watching it because they kept killing Dean and Sam and they'd magically come back to life! I told Dennis I stopped watching soap operas when I was about 17. Oh they are dead! (cry cry cry) ... no! They are alive!! (happiness!) Rise and repeat. So I stopped watching ... oh principal. DAMN MY PRINCIPALS that are stupid and suck monkey balls. I don't know why I listen to my principals. I get a bee in my bonnet....
So I thought .... after watching this one video..... that it's about time I start watching from the beginning. You know - when it was all purely paranormal and no biblical horror seeping in to take over (cuz that's exactly what happened. They started the biblical horror story line and it completely took over. But then again there were always demons.)
SO ANYWAY ..... I was watching (a shortened video of) this video..... where Jenson exposes how he normally reads a script in the privacy of his home, on his couch, when he's comfortable... in the different voices. For example, the stage direction is read with an Australian accent. And Misha, well, his parts he reads as a "gay hairdresser" and it's freaking halarious!
(It was only a 3 minute video but this one is better, gives away more! Muahahahahahahahahah)
Holy crap! I thunk it's time for me to resume my Supernatural-edimacation .... cuz I am sick and looking this shit up to laugh (and cough to death thanks to the flu)
So I started from the Pilot and watched through episode 5 (so five episodes)
1 "Pilot"
2 "Wendigo"
3 "Dead in the Water"
4 "Phantom Traveler"
5 "Bloody Mary"
I believe that I started around 11:30pm last night.
So before I started watching Supernatural .... I was going on about how I was pissed that they only have three episodes of Sherlock up of each the first two seasons ... I've been putting off watching it since it hit Netflix because I want to watch it! DB says "Have you looked up how many episodes are in each season?" I said "SURELY it isn't THREE episodes." I looked it up. It's three episodes. Bollocks!
So after I had a nap, I started watching ... I re-watched the first episode (DB and I watched awhile back, like, a long while back.) ... watching episode two ... now. BUT SERIOUSLY - how can three episodes be called a "season" or "series" in BBC terms. Regardless it is redonk.
Just when I was going to try to sleep, Kaedyn woke up and started to make so much noise, I kept telling him to stop because he was going to wake up Nathan, so of course he doesn't ... and he wakes up Nathan.... and it all started because he was yelling for the cat. Then he was searching for his tablet. Then he was playing with his tin of pennies. Then he was emptying out a plastic bag, and then refilling it ... and then......... I THREATENED TO PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE IF HE DIDN'T STOP MAKING NOISE. Yes, I threatened to punch my 8 year old in the face. But I wasn't serious and he knew it cuz he just goes "Nooooooo" and starts laughing. Because I'm a bark with no bite. But I did tell him that I was going to kiss it and make it better after, and he thought that was funnier.
By the time it was time to get ready for school, I was about ready to skin them. But I helped get him dressed in PJ's (because it was PJ day in his class today) ... and he got to take a few lovies with him and a snack. Nathan actually got dressed on his own today - and the world didn't end!!
So ... as I was sitting on the floor getting clothes for the kids today.... I happened to find a large patch of dry skin on the bottom on my foot, I hate dry skin. Well I proceeded to yank it off. Wasn't such a bright idea. Definitely wasn't a bright idea. It seemed to be still attached to some newer skin. Oops
Since I'm still not feeling real well, the animals were all around and happy ... watching over me.
This is day two of me having to tell Jaxson that he could get up off my bed and leave to go outside to go potty. Because he didn't want to leave me. Kinda makes me feel like I'm dying, honestly.
Alyvia sat in the window and looked at me like she'd rather
Mellow and Alyvia - they have this love hate relationship. One minute they are getting along. The next they are batting at each other. One minute he's giving her a bath, the next she's bitching at him for meowing at her wrong.
And then this happens ...
The four boys got home and Kaedyn rushed up to me..... this is what followed...
Kaedyn: Hi Mom
Mom: Hi Kaedyn, how was school?
Kaedyn: Middle face. 😐
Mom: Why middle face?
Kaedyn: Because.
Mom: Because ..... ???
Kaedyn: Because I cried.
Mom: Why'd you cry?
Kaedyn: I don't know
Mom: Yes you do
(after a bunch of prompting and avoidance)
Kaedyn: I don't know how to say it!
Mom: Was someone mean to you?
Kaedyn: No........... Yes.......
Mom: How were they mean?
Kaedyn: They wouldn't share.
Mom: They wouldn't share .... what?
Kaedyn: Tether ball...
Mom: Ooooooooohhhh....
Kaedyn: And I cried at the movie
Mom: What movie?
Kaedyn: Inside Out
Mom: Oh that's a good movie...
Kaedyn: I cried at the end
Mom: Still a good movie ...
The boys are playing on the Xbox, the Hunky Hubby is doing school work, making dinner and jamming to music... and I'm trying not to die when I cough... .
Dennis and I played some music tonight, while we were getting the boys ready for bed, meds and all that. We let them come to bed on their own tonight and both are fast asleep before 9pm. Nathan was asleep before 8pm, which is normal. Kaedyn has been asleep probably for a half hour or so right now (8:45pm) ...
I know, dear readers.... you must think I live a pretty sad existence. I do, I do.... but... it's not unhappy. I mean it is at times - being sick all the damn time is not fun. Not at all. I feel like all I talk about is TV, Movies, and the boys ... LOL ... well that is pretty much the life.
Watched Bones & Lethal Weapon with the sexy man I lay beside, tonight before he fell asleep. Watched Lip Sync Battle that I thought Cal would be DYING to watch, but he didn't seem to care. Watched Hell's Kitchen and started Grey's by myself before midnight stroked.
Every DAMN TIME I watch Grey's I start bawling. It's just not right. I have watched an episode or two of Scandal. I used to watch How To Get Away With Murder but fell off a couple of seasons ago.
Tonight's episode is not going to be any exception ...
Every once in awhile ... when DB is snoring.... I swear - I hear the dog whining outside the door. But... it's just whistling coming from DB and his snoring - it's odd. Very odd. Just don't tell him I said that........ (shhhhhhhhhhh)
So something I have noticed lately - it's like I have shadow spots now on my skin where my red spots had been. I have been noticing a few spots showing up here and there on my skin, but they are only a handful and last time they come on SO quickly. So I don't think this outbreak is going to be bad, but it is there, it's just a lot less now.
I had a discussion very very early this morning (around midnight/1AM). It's weird and kinda hard. My B-Friend *S* ... well, she and I had preemies together. We were in the same NICU. We our own journeys ... she had that of the mom of a 23 weeker who survived with a lot of struggles. I had that of a mom of a mirco-preemie who was the size of a 24 weeker born at 33 weeks and a much easier, smoother sail, in the preemie department."
So she kinda approached me with this idea. She said that she knew I hadn't been active on CafeMom really anymore, for a long long time, and she hadn't either - but she wanted to branch out her preemie group again and remake some connections, create some new connections. She and I have both had two preemies, hers were early preemies, mine were late but small preemies. It is something I am passionate about, however it is not where my calling is. My calling feels more about bringing awareness for Trisomy and other Chromosome Disorders. Especially the rare ones, the ones you are told - as a definite - your child would not survive, BECAUSE THEY DO.
Sorry ..... was about to get sidetracked.
Anyway - I feel like I politely and respectfully told her no, and explained to her that between my health, my husband's health, my kids health, school demands for both my husband, and all the boys (including homeschooling Noah) and just having to have time for ME in there also, which I have to find again ... I cannot put something else on my plate.
Normally, I would have said "Yes, absolutely" and gone and done it, and not have been able to be what she wanted, because she wanted a partner in every way with it... I can participate in it, but I can't help her create, promote, and run it. I can't keep up with the things I do run.
Nor would I ever be able to go back to CafeMom because of ... well, frankly and literally, her. She broke my heart on there, she spread a lot of lies about once I told I could not be friends with her anymore. She sought out my friends on there, and told them, that I was this and that and the other thing, which most of what she said wasn't true, that the stuff she did say that was true, I admitted to freely.
She pulled this out tonight, too...
"Promise me nothing will ever come between us again"
I can't promise that, I don't have a crystal ball. It's not something I can do... because I cannot predict the future, I can only speak of which in this moment, what I would like to happen. I cannot make a promise of nothing every coming between us again.
I can promise not to try to let it. That's all I can do.
Probably was not happy with my answer or my lack of promising.
My only goal in life, at this moment - right now, is to be true to myself and my family. I have let a lot of the things of the past go, but I have realized that no matter if you let them go or not, forgive and plan to forget, hurt lingers. Words - no matter if they are spoken or typed - hurt. I know I hurt her with my list of reasons why I could no longer have her in my life that day back in 2008. She hurt me a lot, prior to and after my telling her I could no longer be her friend. We've both hurt each other, and I don't even want to get into why she hurt me.
She assumed the only reason I didn't want to talk to her anymore was because of my ex. It wasn't. She asked me why I hadn't ever reached out to her - and it wasn't because of what I did or didn't think she did with my ex, it was what she said about me, the lies she made up and/or spread. That is the reason why. How could I be friends, or want to be friends, with someone who had said such horrible things about me.... how could I want to allow that in my life?
Until recently, when thoughts of her had been on my mind more and more. I felt like, I was in a place where I could forgive. I knew she was in a very dark place back in the day, figured she probably wasn't happy with some of her choices, when I felt like I could always stand by mine. I wasn't in a dark place, I was in a very very happy place. I had found love again, I had another baby, and unknown to me... I was pregnant again. She desperately wanted more children, really wanted love again, and here I was ... had it all ...
So yeah. Sometimes things have to happen in the right moment. And it was that ... much like finding my husband. Sometimes, things just have to unfold and surface in their own time.
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